


Stitch By Stitch

by NowAndAgain



Category: BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: Basically I'm dumb and gay, F/F, Getting Together, Knitting as a coping mechanism?, Lisa has a Lot of Feelings, Lisa's basically constantly trying to get Yukina to wife her up, Pining, Slow Burn, Yukina's terrible at understanding them, and I think that's cute as hell, based loosely off of that one comic where Lisa knits Yukina like 60 things, but happy ending, kinda angsty?, you know the one i'm talking about
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-06-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:20:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23572240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NowAndAgain/pseuds/NowAndAgain
Summary: After Yukina pulls away, Lisa learns how to knit
Relationships: Imai Lisa/Minato Yukina
Comments: 28
Kudos: 77





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Normally I'd wait until I'm finished with something to post it but the fact of the matter is I have NEVER managed to post anything that was and I'm stupid and gay and need to get back into writing and the YukiLisa stuff online isn't Enough for me so I'm going to try and write a little every day and post what I have at the end of the day. It's probably gonna be like ~500 words a day and I'll probably repost it as one doc when I'm finished? If you have any comments, advice, whatever, I'd love some feedback/critic?

It starts, oddly enough, right before everything goes bad. It’s July, two weeks before their first real high school term, and its so, so hot. Lisa has meticulously crafted everything about the day - the outfits, the food, the schedule (which she’s re-color-coded, re-organized, re-cross-referenced, and re-confirmed with Yukina six times since yesterday) - and she’s so excited she can hardly sit still. She’s up at 5 am, not out of necessity, but because she can’t sleep, and by the time Minato-san calls a sleepy Yukina down at 8 am, Lisa has the Bentos packed and is dressed and ready to go. 

“...Dad won’t be here to drive us for two hours,” Yukina stares at her in her piercing, straightforward way, still in pajamas and slippers. “I know!” Lisa responds, bouncing restlessly on the balls of her feet, “I’m just so excited!” It’d taken her two weeks to get Yukina to agree to this trip, bribing her with free food, organizing rides from their parents ahead of time and cajoling her with promises to accompany her vocals with bass every day for the rest of the summer. Yukina’s a homebody, reluctant to leave their quiet town and even more reluctant to do so for places she wasn’t familiar with, but Lisa just knows she’ll love the beach they’re going to. Quiet, secluded, Lisa’s family had gone over winter vacation for Christmas, and although the weather wasn’t fit to swim and the Imai’s had preoccupied her with gifts and excursions to the nearby city, she hadn’t stopped thinking of Yukina the entire time. How much she’d love it, how well suited she’d be to the dunes and the waves once they unfroze. How much fun they might have. Lisa had been planning this for months. “C’mon!” she chirps, unfazed by Yukina’s lukewarm response. “I wanna help you pick out your outfit!” Yukina shrugs and turns for the stairs, the tips of her hair following just a second off-beat with a gentle swish, syncopated. Though, she’s not fast enough to hide the edges of her smile. Lisa grins, doesn’t hesitate to chase after.

Yukina’s dad drops them off on the way to a gig, and Lisa and Yukina cram into her van alongside two 30-something guitarists and most of a drum set. The ride up is peaceful, relaxed- Minato-san and his bandmates smoke out the open windows, staring silently at the countryside and don’t speak, but Lisa barely notices. She fills the stillness with a non-stop stream of bubbly chatter, about the weather, the things she has planned, the upcoming school year, does Yukina think high school will be much harder than middle school, anything she can think of. Yukina is quiet, responds with noncommital hums, occasional one-word answers, short comments and responses, but Lisa doesn’t mind. She’s used to it. She just knows the day is going to be perfect, can feel Yukina’s excitement as they get closer, even if Yukina won’t admit it, and when Minato-san drops them off at the park entrance Lisa kicks off her shoes, takes Yukina’s hand in hers, and runs through the sand, gleeful, incandescent. Beside her, Yukina doesn’t try and disguise her smile.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit Gets Real

The day goes by in a blur of happiness for Lisa, and her carefully planned agenda gets abandoned halfway through. Bentos on a rocky cliff face, sandcastles that wash away when the tide comes in, lazy hours floating next to Yukina, it blends together into a perfect, endless moment. Lisa takes pictures until her phone runs out of charge - Yukina in the waves, Yukina trying on a broad-rimmed sunhat they find at a tourist stall, Yukina with her nose wrinkled when Lisa splashes her, Yukina smiling, Yukina laughing, Yukina, Yukina, Yukina. Lisa was right - she’s so perfect here, fits in like the curves of the dunes were specially crafted for her, like the ocean pulls the water in just so it can lap at her feet.

Minato-san calls a few hours in to say he’ll be late, so they head into town when the sun starts to get low for dinner, and Lisa doesn’t care her schedule is ruined, not when everything is so much better than she could have imagined. They share ramen on a bench as the sunsets, and it’s a little like one of the romcoms Lisa’s mother watches - a thought that makes Lisa’s insides squirm in a way she doesn’t recognize. “So,” Lisa asks playfully, “was it all that bad?” Yukina frowns, looks away. “...maybe not,” she admits, a grin tugging at the edge of her lips. “Although I don’t know if it was worth all time you spent bothering me about it.” Lisa laughs, hands her the ice cream cone they’re sharing for a lick. She hums, and Yukina meets her eyes. The sun is setting and her hair looks metallic in the orange hues. Lisa can’t look away. 

“Nah,” she smiles, edges of her mouth nearly splitting her face in two “definitely worth it.” The heat of the day has melted, sizzling off as the sun sinks into the churning oceans, and with the breeze off the water, it’s almost cold. The trees bend with the oncoming evening gust, and Yukina shivers involuntarily. Instinctively Lisa reaches out, takes her hands. “Here,” she says, “it’ll keep them warm.” Yukina looks startled, for some reason, but Lisa feels her skin warm and squeezes gently. “I’ll keep you warm.” She finishes the thought. For a moment, Yukina’s face is serious, stormy, but the edges of her eyes crinkle and oh, oh Lisa glows. A perfect day. The trees bend but Lisa doesn’t feel it.

But the moment falls, and that’s where everything turns, Lisa thinks. Yukina’s phone buzzes, and she starts, lets go. Her eyes dart to the street and Minato-sans white sedan sits there, expectant. Lisa only has minutes to naively wonder why Minato-san wouldn’t get out and greet them before she climbs into the empty backseat and the cold sets in.

The ride home is as quiet as the ride there, but this time a tension crackles in the air that Lisa can’t place. The guitarists aren’t there, nor is the drum set they came with, Lisa doesn’t know where they would have gone. Minato-san doesn’t say hello, just starts driving. Yukina grows stiff in the seat next to her, and Lisa reaches out, grasps her hand again, but this time, the heat doesn’t quite seem to penetrate. Minato-san chain-smokes in silence and drops Lisa off, even though she lives next door. She peeks through the curtains of her mothers’ foyer when the sedan pulls into the Minato’s garage, waits in anticipation as no one emerges. 5 minutes. 10. 20. Finally, the door slams and two figures emerge. Minato-san stalks inside, Yukina trailing behind. Lisa tries to catch her eye, but Yukina’s gaze is trained at the ground. She can feel the tension through the air, through the walls, feel the cold seeping off Yukina in waves as the Minato’s door slips shut. Quickly, Lisa rushes upstairs, flings open her window, waiting for Yukina to appear as she always did, in the bedroom across the fence. When the light flicks on, she perks up, but strangely, Yukina doesn’t come to the window. Lisa watches her figure move, waiting patiently, a hand absently extended towards the screen as if she can bridge the distance between them, retrieve that warmth from just hours before. The light flicks off. Lisa’s mom has to drag her away.

Lisa doesn’t see Yukina until school starts again in late August, but they all hear. Muffled voices from the Minato’s every night, Minato-san on the back drinking, the sound of yelling and breaking at late hours. Through it all, Yukina doesn’t come to the window. Lisa watches diligently through the blinds as Yukina’s outline moves through her room, willing her to say something, do something, but it never happens.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm going crazy cooped up inside but if one good thing comes of it I'm writing regularly again. This came out sadder than I expected but to be fair I'm sadder than I expected too. Anyway, feedback/comments are always appreciated!

The first day of school Lisa is up at 5 am, not out of necessity, but because she can’t sleep. She lays in bed for over an hour before she gives up any hope of another minute of shuteye. Does her hair, picks out an outfit, practices her bass with her earbuds plugged into the amp. She waits for an hour in front of the Minato’s, kicking rocks on the stoop, for Yukina to emerge. They’ve walked to school together every day for the last five years - even their sick days have overlapped. If Yukina got sick, there was no way she’d have caught anything Lisa hadn’t. As the minutes tick by, Lisa’s anxiety grows. By the time she’s given up waiting, she’s already late. Lisa runs halfway to school and still doesn’t make it in time for the second bell. She walks into her first class three minutes late to a stern look from her teacher and side-eyes from the other students, and worries her way through the morning, barely paying enough attention to recognize when the teacher calls on her. When lunch comes, she finds the class Yukina’s supposed to be in and pays it a visit, hoping to ease her mind. When she can’t find her there, Lisa checks everywhere she can think of - the library, the baseball bleachers, behind the groundskeeper’s shed, nothing. ‘ _Where are you? Wanna have lunch together tomorrow?’_ she texts Yukina minutes before class starts up again, trying to sound as unconcerned as possible. ‘ _I’m worried -’_ she types, then deletes. ‘ _Are you okay - ’_ no. ‘ _I miss you’_ she stares at what she’s written for a second, then deletes that too. “Phones away, Imai-san.” The teacher looks pissed. Lisa rushes an apology and does her best to try and pay attention. As soon as the day ends, she checks her phone. No response.

No response comes that night, or the next morning, or the day after that. Lisa waits at the sidewalk in front of Yukina’s house for the next two days, even tries to knock, but gets nothing. But on the fourth day, Yukina shows up at school. Lisa’s been checking her classroom at lunch, but when she sees her quietly eating in the back corner of class 1C, her heart leaps into her throat. She fixes her hair real quick. “Yukina!” Lisa greets, warm and cheerful. “What do you have for lunch today?” Yukina meets her eyes and Lisa’s smile falters for a second. She’s quiet, then looks down. “Salmon.”

“Sounds tasty! I packed rice balls! My mom and I made them after school yesterday.” Lisa tries to casually continue. “Say, where were you the last few days? I thought we were going to walk to school together! Nearly missed, the first day,” she laughs, trying to sound light, sheepishly scratching the back of her neck. Yukina is quiet for another uncomfortable second, gives Lisa another inscrutable look. “Osaka. For a competition.”

This takes Lisa by surprise. “For singing?” she asks. She hadn’t known Yukina was interested in vocal competitions. She’d always said she didn’t care about solo performance, had idolized her dad’s band, dreamed of creating one of her own. Said she didn’t see the point. “Yes.” Yukina says between bites, “It was a few days. The school excused me from classes for the duration.”

“I thought you didn’t do vocal competitions?” Lisa falters slightly, “But that’s cool! How did you do?” Yukina stands up abruptly, packs up her lunch. “It was about time I got serious,” she says coolly, an edge to her voice. “I’m not just playing around. If I want to be taken seriously, I should act seriously. You should too,” her eyes flash and something in Lisa’s stomach drops. “We’re not kids anymore. I’m not going to get anywhere practicing in the backyard with an off-tempo bass line.” She turns to leave. Lisa knows she should be hurt by that, should be mad at Yukina, but as she watches her retreating figure flounce out of the classroom, all she can think about is how lonely Yukina looks in that instant. When she walks home, by herself, Lisa doesn’t think about Yukina’s harsh words, doesn’t think about what will happen next, doesn’t think about the icy feeling growing in the back of her throat or the tears prickling on her cheeks. Instead, when the fall breeze skirts her cardigan, she thinks about how cold Yukina looked in that doorway when her arms came up to hug her small frame. She thinks about how cold she must be now, walking home from school. And when her mother asks her how her day was when she gets home and she breaks down in the kitchen, sobbing, hysterical, what really makes her cry is  the thought that’s been buzzing in her head since lunchtime - Lisa couldn’t keep her warm. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I meant to keep updating this every day but it turns out that when finals are two week away that's easier said than done. Anyway, until my classes let out this'll probably update 2-3 times a week, all on the weekends. Thanks to everyone for the great response so far!! I love reading the comments. Tried to address some notes/issues with paragraph length, hope this reads better :)

After she calms down, Lisa asks her mother to teach her how to knit. 

Her mother certainly doesn’t know much - her creative streak doesn’t extend far outside of the kitchen, but she has the supplies and shows Lisa a few simple stitches. Lisa curls up in her room and looks up a tutorial on the internet. She sits in front of it and mimics the movements until her needles are clicking in time with the greying woman on her screen. Gets lost in the transfixing motion, the hypnotizing sound, so much so she doesn’t even notice when the video ends and she’s left in silence. Silence and yarn, the soft clack of the linking strands. 

But then the silence is broken, ever so softly, by a voice that Lisa could pick out facing a jet engine. Quiet and clear, through her open window, Yukina begins to practice and Lisa freezes. The tune is something she recognizes - an old folk song, with words she can’t quite remember. She recalls sleepovers at Yukina’s when they were young, her parents tucking them in. A gentle kiss on Yukina’s forehead, something quietly hummed under the breath as the light from the hallway narrowed. 

It’s in a minor key, a low and mournful melody that Lisa can barely pick out from the distance but as it crescendos, Yukina’s voice grows clearer. Lisa doesn’t breathe, doesn’t twitch, doesn’t move a muscle, afraid if she does the moment will end. That Yukina will know somehow, will mind. It’s not inherently a private thing but Lisa feels guilty listening in, what with the way things are between them. It feels voyeuristic somehow. Then, as the notes climb, Yukina’s voice suddenly cracks and the world goes quiet. Lisa listens carefully, for what feels like an hour, but the frustrating quiet only grows. Then, a dull note. Lisa recognizes Yukina’s vocal exercises. Lisa’s cheeks feel damp.

Lisa gets up and shuts her window, resumes knitting, more quickly this time.

For the second night in a row, Lisa gets no sleep. She stays up knitting all night, fumbling through perls and stitches, goes to school with dark circles under her eyes and sleeps through lunch. Gets home, rinses, repeats. Yukina practices every evening, different songs, different scales, different vocal exercises, and though Lisa tries not to listen she always seems to forget to close her window. The sad melody from before doesn’t make a reappearance, and though Yukina’s voice is beautiful, the tone is somehow stale. Emotionless. Flat. Lisa has to fight to keep from crying whenever she hears it, works harder on her project, stays up later into the night. 

Two weeks after the fight Lisa finishes her knitting, ties off the end of a simple beanie. It’s yellow at the bottom, green at the top because Lisa ran out of yellow yarn halfway through, and it isn’t the prettiest, but it’s finished. Lisa wraps it in tissue paper and ties it off with a bow and brings it to school the very next day. She thrums with anticipation all through homeroom, through her first class, all the way until lunch, and when the bell rings she trips over herself trying to get out of the room. Lisa sprints across the school to Yukina’s classroom, nearly runs into a distressed senior boy on her way, and then as she turns the corner into Yukina’s hall - right into Yukina. 

Lisa, of course, falls flat on the ground, but there’s an upperclassman behind Yukina who catches Yukina under the arms as she stumbles backward from the collision. Lisa’s left staring up at Yukina’s startled face, transfixed. It hadn’t occurred to her - she hadn’t thought about it until just now, but she hadn’t seen Yukina since she walked out of the classroom the second week of school. She’d glimpsed her silhouette through the curtains, sure, but really  _ seen  _ her…

Lisa’s breath catches in her throat and shame wells up in her throat. Yukina, off-balance disheveled, but still somehow...Lisa can’t find the words. Her face is surprised but her eyes...she looks so different somehow, steely gazed and dressed in their high school uniform, so small. Something wells up within Lisa and she can’t, she can’t be here, she can’t believe she thought her stupid project would be enough, would ever be good enough for Yukina when she’s so, she’s so…

“I-I’m sorry,” Lisa manages to stutter out as she scrambles to her feet. Yukina’s still frozen in shock and Lisa  _ can’t be here _ and she turns, and Lisa runs.

When she gets home, Lisa throws her still-wrapped present, weeks of work and late nights, into the trash bin outside her neighbor’s house.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two in a row! Kobe! Feeling ok about getting a chapter out tomorrow too. Anyway this is probably gonna be the last really sad one, I promise. Thanks for all the support again <3

The pit in Lisa’s stomach had festered the rest of the school day, churning and tearing at her insides, so bad that when Lisa finally makes it to her room she just lays against the side of her bed and heaves. What the hell, what the hell was that? Something in Lisa gnaws at her when she thinks about Yukina these days and tries to pin down what reduces her so low, so frantic, so achingly empty. The way her heart stutters when she sees Yukina seemed like second nature when they saw each other every day, when Lisa could be by her, stand at her side, but those reflexes had atrophied with their separation and now when the mere Yukina pulls on her heart strings it hurts. It scares her just how much. 

She does the only logical thing. Yukina made it clear she doesn’t want Lisa in her life, so Lisa needs to  _ stop,  _ needs to not think and care and long for her. Needs to stop feeling...this way. As much as Lisa aches without her oldest friend, she cannot let herself be the thing that gets in Yukina’s way. So she packs everything up.

Photos. Gifts. The cat-shaped pillow on her bed that Yukina used to cling to during thunderstorms. Her bass, of course, and all the sheet music she could never learn quickly enough to properly accompany the vocals. Lisa closes her window and locks it, pulls the curtains shut tight and knots them together so she can’t moon out her window at Yukina’s shadow. What she’s been doing, it’s weird now, right? It may have been ok when they were little, when Lisa followed Yukina around like a lost duckling, when Yukina still wanted her around, but Yukina’s right, they’re older. She can’t - she shouldn’t be doing that anymore. It’s time to get serious. 

Lisa empties her life and tries to focus on school. No more late afternoons at the Minatos, she goes over the English notes 20 times to stave off the boredom. Tries her best not to think about how English was always Yukina’s worst subject. Tries her very hardest not to wonder how she’s doing with vocabulary tests now that Lisa’s not there to quiz her. She stops falling asleep during class and instead packs extra pencils and erasers and color codes her notes. She starts volunteering to stay later, jumping at the opportunity to make herself useful. 

Minato-san’s van disappears from the driveway next door and so do the beer cans in Yukina’s backyard.

Lisa even makes some new friends, a few girls from her class she shares lunch with when she doesn’t study through it and who she’ll sometimes see on the weekends. They’re not real friends, of course, more just school friends, but Hana-san and Aki-chan are nice, very nice. They sit with her while she does her homework after school and gossip about boys. Tease her when she doesn’t seem to care. If she’s being honest, she hasn’t been paying much attention to the people in her class. Just a lot of empty faces, benign prescences in her life. She probably couldn’t pick even one of the boys Aki-chan deliberates over out of a line up. 

“Lisa-san’s so serious,” Hana comments over udon one weekend, “I want to meet the person who makes her look up one day.” Aki picks at her nails. Lisa makes her brain go blank, forces herself not to think. Smiles mindlessly and pays for her food.

Even through her closed blinds, she can still hear Yukina practice. 

Lisa’s grades do improve. People notice. She’d never been one for school, but suddenly her grades catch up to the geniuses in the class - the nerds, the popular savants, the professional girls. She doesn’t care. On days where Aki and Hana are both absent - sick, or playing hooky, Lisa sits outside of the music room and listens to Yukina practice during lunch. She’s gotten really good. Really,  _ really _ good. Her voice doesn’t crack on the highest notes anymore, and the melody is clear and powerful, even if it still misses that emotion Lisa remembers from before. When Lisa thinks about it too hard, it makes her cry. How can she ever keep up with that? How can she ever expect to be good enough to stand at Yukina’s side again? When Yukina shines so brightly, Lisa should just be happy that she ever got to reflect a little of that light.

But she isn’t. It isn’t enough.

When they get back from winter break, the grades are posted in the entrance and there’s a throng of people gathered to see how they’d done. While Aki and Hana bemoan their poor performance and Aki frets about having to retake if she doesn’t work harder this term, Lisa absently scans the listings. 

“Hey, Lisa, isn’t that your name?” a boy from their class interrupts suddenly, pointing to the top of the list. Lisa follows his gaze and her eyes land on her name next to the coveted “1” spot. Imai Lisa. 198. Almost perfect score. 

“Lisa! Congratulations!” Hana cheers, patting her on the back. The boy from their class says something vaguely encouraging but Lisa doesn’t hear him. Her eyes fall on a solitary figure, enmeshed in the crowd but somehow still alone, easy to pick out, separate from the rest. And to her surprise, she finds the figure is looking right back. Yukina. Lisa meets her golden stare, head suddenly fuzzy and chest tight. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This took....too long....sry....i don't have a decent excuse but the world has been stressful shrug emoji, anyway finally we move into the part of the story that makes me go aAHHHHH so enjoy

Once Lisa’s eyes meet Yukina’s (for the first time in a long time, she thinks) everything stops. The moment seems to extend forever, Lisa thinks, or perhaps time slows down around them. The background seems to fade away from her, as if the whole of her existence can be compressed down into the distance between her and Yukina. 

“Lisa? Hey Lisa?” Hana’s voice shatters the moment and Lisa starts. Yukina looks away, turns, and disappears into the crowd. Lisa watches her retreating back, temporarily stunned. 

“Lisa? We gotta get going,” Aki helpfully interjects. “Bell just rang.” Lisa nods numbly, follows after her friends, eyes still fixed at the point in space where Yukina disappeared into the crowd. Predictably, she doesn’t pay attention in class that day.

After school, Lisa volunteers to stay behind and clean the classroom. She’s gotten into the habit of doing so, partially because she has nothing better to do, no one waiting for her (Aki and Hana live in the opposite direction) and partially to avoid running into Yukina on her walk home. It’s not that Lisa doesn’t  _ want  _ to see her - she does, more than anything - but to be so close and not able to do anything, to be reminded of how things between them used to be...Lisa doesn’t think she could stand it. So she stays. Cleans the chalkboard, empties the trash, carries the notebooks up to the office. Picks gum off of the windowsill of next to Goya-san’s desk on days when the lessons had been particularly dull. Wastes away the time until going home becomes unavoidable. She doubts anyone actually knows how late she stays. Whenever she leaves, the halls are empty. The school is quiet, and it's hers.

This time, however, when Lisa closes her classroom door with a click, she’s not alone. Standing next to the window, shuffling her feet, hands clenched tight against her bookbag, is Yukina. She starts as the door clicks, makes eye contact with Lisa, quickly looks away then back again, almost sheepish. Lisa’s heart stutters into action, so loud and fast she’s sure Yukina can hear it, even with the distance between them. 

“Yukina,” Lisa forces a weak smile, turning back to the door to fiddle with the handle. If she looks at her directly, Lisa feels, her chest will explode, ream open like in the sci-fi movies her dad likes to watch. “What are you doing here?”

It’s quiet for a moment, so much so that Lisa almost believes that Yukina has left. Then, ignoring her question entirely, Yukina speaks. 

“...Congratulations.” It’s so quiet Lisa almost doesn’t hear it. 

“On your exam scores I mean,” Yukina hurriedly follows up. “It’s...it’s really impressive.” Lisa forces a smile onto her face and turns. “Thanks for saying that,” it feels hollow even as the words leave her lips. She can feel Yukina’s eyes on her and feels the accompanying pit in her stomach grow conspicuously large. She wants to run. Wants to escape this situation, the awkwardness between them, run away to a time when things were simpler. When they were ok. “I’ve had…” Lisa pauses, considering her words. She doesn’t want to cry, forces back the emotions that have been welling up inside her. “I thought a lot about what you said.” She finishes, and Yukina startles. “You were right. It’s...it was time to get serious.” 

Standing in the hallway, Yukina looks uncomfortable all of a sudden, lifts her arms to hug her sides. Something in Lisa aches, and she can’t stop it even if she wanted to. “So I did. I got serious.” Lisa finishes distantly. Yukina’s looking at her searchingly now, something impenetrable in her face that Lisa can’t quite track. “I hope you’re doing well. I should probably head home now.” Lisa smiles again, her cheeks aching with disuse, turns to leave.

“...walk home with me.” Lisa stops dead in her track. Does a double-take. Closes her eyes, wonders if this is another dream. Almost pinches herself. 

“If you want,” Yukina adds, almost abashed, and there’s no universe, no reality, no time or place where Lisa could say no to that request. Despite herself, Lisa feels a genuine grin break through her face. “Sure.” she says, “I’d like that.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the support and feedback! Procrastinating on other writing so this should update more frequently lmao. Sorry if this is a little rough, I was having a hard time getting through this segment, so I'm still not completely happy with it, but oh well (shrug emoji). Hopefully the rest will be a bit smoother!

They start walking home together again. Lisa still stays late to help clean, but even though they don’t talk about it, when Lisa finishes up in her classroom, Yukina is in the hallway waiting for her. Their first year in high school is in its second half and Lisa feels as if she’s lost - as if she’s  _ losing - so _ much time. They don’t talk during school, don’t spend time together outside of their daily walks, and although Lisa is thankful for the time she gets, Yukina is still so frustratingly distant. Lisa listens to her practice through her bedroom window while she does maths, and even in its piercing clearness Yukina’s voice sounds faded and far, tined, like the faded records her grandmother will play on lazy evenings. 

Aki and Hana notice Lisa’s unease quickly - even though she’s a mostly passive presence in their lunchtime chats, quiet, piping up when she has something to add about the latest trends or particularly good recipes, it’s hard not to see something’s on her mind. 

“You’ve been so sad lately, Lisa-chii,” Aki comments a week after Lisa and Yukina start to talk again, her brows knit together as she works on a particularly tough piece of shrimp. Lisa tries to laugh it off, pretends she’s fine, but the snow is coming down particularly hard that day and when she finishes their English test early, Lisa finds herself wondering whether Yukina has dressed warmly enough. The school heaters aren’t quite enough to combat the chill at Lisa’s seat by the window, and she can only be thankful Yukina always sits so close to the door. 

Sure enough, when Yukina meets her by her classroom after school, she’s shivering slightly. Lisa fights the instinct to warm Yukina’s hands with hers, dismisses it in its absurdity, and they head off. She chats inanely about her day, fills the silence that has always tailed their friendship. Not that she minds. Lisa has always been the chatty sort, prone to the sort of nervous babbling that chased away other kids when she was younger. Only Yukina didn’t seem to notice, never seemed to mind. Just nodded and smiled. Well, nodded at least - Lisa doesn’t see her smile quite as much. Not anymore.

Lisa’s chain of thought is interrupted suddenly when Yukina lets out a powerful sneeze. Lisa starts, only now noting the reddish tinge that coats her cheeks and ears. Yukina sniffs and looks at her, grumpy expression almost daring her to say anything, and it’s so...cute, weirdly enough. Lisa giggles, hand against her mouth, set oddly at ease by this banal display. Things had been so...weird between them, so forced, for all Lisa’s efforts, but this is what she remembers. Yukina’s grumpy pout when her mother fussed over her, her tendency to catch any and every virus that circulated their school, her stubborn expression whenever her body didn’t quite do what she wanted it to, Yukina being - Yukina. 

“Here,” Lisa smiles softly, pulling off her mittens and scarf and handing them to Yukina. “You shouldn’t forget them next time. Don’t want you getting sick, do we?” 

Yukina gets that peculiarly impenetrable expression again, but huffs and accepts Lisa’s offer, wrapping the scarf tightly around her throat. “Aren’t you going to get cold now?” she side eyes Lisa, still searching, a little closed. 

“Nah,” Lisa shrugs, pulling her jacket a little tighter. “I’ll be fine. I’ve got you.”

Yukina’s face gets somehow redder and she buries her nose in Lisa’s scarf. Lisa laughs. 

“...Whatever.”

She’d only meant to tease Yukina, but deep down, Lisa knows it's true. Snowflakes in her hair, bundled in Lisa’s things, even looking at Yukina makes Lisa’s chest feel warm, her face flush. Something about the image just feels right to her. Comfortable. 

When they get back to their houses Yukina returns Lisa’s things, nods goodbye, and Lisa watches her back head away for maybe a few seconds longer than she should. Holds her scarf to her face, still smells Yukina’s familiar scent on it.

But that’s weird, she knows. Lisa immediately drops the fabric from her face in shame, turns away. Yukina won’t keep letting her hang around if she does things like that. It’s…

Lisa doesn’t know what.

When she gets inside, Lisa throws her winter things in the drier to get the damp out, heads upstairs to start on her homework, but she can’t focus. Yukina’s started practicing, just like she does every day, but her voice still sounds so cold. So much more distant than the careless banter they’d shared just minutes before. Under Lisa’s teasing, she’d sounded almost - warm. Familiar. 

Staring at her ceiling, Lisa has an idea.


End file.
